ADHD and Perfectionism

My ADHD clients a lot of time tell me they consider themselves a perfectionist. Sounds great, huh? Well, not really. Believing that you need to do things perfectly is a way of keeping yourself stuck and unhappy. It contributes to overwhelm and task paralysis; it is most likely caused by shame, probably feeling not good enough, as you spent your youth being told off for doing things or not doing things, and it means you never can embrace learning, fun and creativity. 

It puts so much pressure on us. As someone who was also a perfectionist, I found it had such a negative impact on my life. I would be too scared to start things, in case I may not be able to make them perfectly. So, working with clients, I realised this was such a common theme with ADHDers.

When my clients talk to me about this, we’ll address it in several ways:

• We’ll explore the benefits of trying things and failing. 

• Look at examples of people who have tried things hundreds or thousands of times (this is basically every inventor you’ve ever heard of). 

• We’ll go through phrases that help keep you realistic about trying things. 

• We’ll look at examples of things you’ve tried and the realistic consequences of that. 

• How would you handle it if you tried something and it wasn’t perfect?

• When is good enough, or when is perfect?

• We’ll go through tools that change how you initiate tasks or how you measure success. 

If you’ve got ADHD and feel that perfectionism is holding you back, why not book a free introductory tool today?